Help Someone You Love Deal With Inappropriate Sexuality Simply and Effectively

Sexuality can be a great blessing or a terrible burden if it’s inappropriate. You can find personal peace in a simple and effective way right there in the privacy of your home computer, laptop, iPad, or smart phone. Definitions of Appropriate and Inappropriate Sexual Behavior This article will define appropriate sexuality in the most general terms.

• Sexual relations between mutually consenting adults are considered appropriate in this article.
• Sexual behavior that continues after one party has said, “No,” is inappropriate.
• Sexual relations with a child under the legal age of consent are always inappropriate.
• Sexual relations in which one of the parties feels guilt, shame, or anxiety are inappropriate because it probably violates mutual consent
• A suggestion of sexuality (lewd jokes; flirtatiousness; hugging and / or kissing) may be considered inappropriate if one or more parties are unwilling participants.
• Sexual relations in the workplace are inappropriate if one of the parties is in a position of authority over the other because the valid mutual consent is not available.
• Public displays of sexuality such as exposing oneself, sexual gesturing, or masturbating, real or implied, are inappropriate.

Victims of Inappropriate Sexual Behavior

If the inappropriate sexual behavior is ongoing and you are the victim of it, you should look for a competent authority to help you protect yourself. In the resources section at the bottom of this article, there is a link to resources you can use to find the right help.

If the inappropriate sexual behavior is in the past, but memories or thoughts of it continue to cause you recurring anxiety, you can deal with the anxiety quite easily and effectively. Since it is a thought of a past event, you have the built-in authority to not think those thoughts.

Let me demonstrate by example. Right now, I want you to pause and think about something that leaves you feeling anxious about inappropriate sexual behavior. But DON’T dwell on it. Immediately say out loud to yourself, “I’m not going to think about that.” If it recurs, say it again, out loud, “I’m not going to think about that.”

You’ll discover that the offending thought about sexuality will go away. It will go away every time you demand that it go away.

Initiators of Inappropriate Sexual Behavior 

If you find yourself driven as an initiator toward inappropriate sexual behavior as defined above or in any other context between adults without mutual consent, you may be risking both social and legal implications that would be harmful to you. You should take steps to deal with such behavior.

In virtually every case, the inappropriate sexual act is triggered by a thought. When you dwell on that thought, it may become an active sexual desire that leads to inappropriate sexual behavior. The safe and simple choice would be “don’t think that thought.”

Right now, I want you to pause and think about something that leaves you being urged toward inappropriate sexual behavior. But DON’T dwell on it. Immediately say out loud to yourself, “I’m not going to think about that.” If it recurs, say it again, out loud, “I’m not going to think about that.”

You’ll discover that the sexually inappropriate thought will go away. It will go away every time you demand that it go away.

A Simple Solution for both Situations

This solution to inappropriate sexual behavior or anxiety related to inappropriate sexual behavior is so simple that many people have trouble accepting it. The answer is to deal with the thought before it creates anxiety or inappropriate behavior.

The most effective way to control such thinking about inappropriate sexuality is to simply say to yourself, out loud, "I will not to think about that." Do it as often as necessary and do it out loud, "I will not to think about that."

Someone said, “That’s easier said than done.”

Not really. You have the innate authority to decide what you want to think about. If a thought leads toward inappropriate sexual behavior or to anxiety about such behavior, don’t think that thought. It’s your choice! As you make that choice again and again, your subconscious remembers how you like to respond and will start to make your response automatically. It’s amazing how quickly this can happen.

At that point, you won't even realize you are thinking about thoughts about inappropriate sexual behavior. Your subconscious mind learns to respond for you automatically before the thought becomes a conscious thought.

Furthermore, your subconscious mind that has over time formed the opinion that you like thinking about the inappropriate sexual behavior because you spend so much time thinking about it. Since your subconscious has the role of making you happy, it will therefore will give you all the thoughts it can to help you continue thinking about the sexual behavior.

The process of choosing not to dwell on thoughts of inappropriate sexual behavior will, over time, convince your subconscious that you do not want to think about that those things anymore. It’s this process that creates the habit of peace and breaks the habit of thinking about inappropriate sex.

Nothing could be more effective than having your subconscious mind deal with your reaction to inappropriate sexual behavior before you even think about it.

Resources you can use 

Help someone you love deal with inappropriate sexuality effectively. Take 3 minutes to learn more at http://findingpersonalpeace.com/s034.

Click http://findingpersonalpeace.com/student/hotlines.pdf  for a list of resources you can use to find protection for yourself if you are the victim of on-going inappropriate sexual behavior.

You can use this idea for just about any negative emotion or habit that bothers you including being the victim or the perpetrator of inappropriate sexual behavior.

I hope Finding Personal Peace helps you as much with inappropriate sexuality issues as it helped me with my anger problem.

 
 Rod Peeks

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