Righteous Anger or Righteous Excuse

Anger is destructive.  Your anger can kill you; not to mention destroy all your important relationships. You can deal with your anger in a way that is far more simple and far more effective than anything you've tried before.

Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to all kinds of problems; problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life. And it can make you feel as though you're at the mercy of an unpredictable and powerful emotion.

Righteous Anger or Righteous Excuse

A lot of us grew up believing anger was a "bad" emotion. But it’s okay to feel anger when an outrageous offense demands a response. You can express those feelings righteously! Thankfully, God's Word sets clear parameters for getting peeved, one of which is don’t let the sun go down on your anger. Get angry if you have to, but get over it.

We need to be careful not to use “righteous anger” as an excuse for all our outbursts. Just know that Scripture contains many more verses warning people against blowing their cool than verses advocating such behavior.

Your Anger can Hurt You

Let’s face some harsh facts. Your anger can hurt you physically as much as it can hurt you emotionally. Prolonged anger can cause dangerous increases in hormone levels, blood pressure, and it can cause damage to internal organs. Some studies indicate that anger can increase the likelihood of heart attacks and strokes.

Anger can become addictive in that it produces a sort of "adrenalin thrill" somewhat like you can experience skydiving, bungee jumping, or riding a roller coaster.

Unrestricted anger can result in a "rage" that can cause us to harm ourselves or people around us. I know you've heard of "road rage" and "acts of passion" that resulted in injury or death, sometimes to innocent parties.

Common approaches to anger

Popular approaches to anger include "taking a timeout" or "punching a pillow" to vent your anger. Some suggest that you "scream" or use exercise as a vent. People are taught conflict resolution, how to be assertive, and how to remove oneself from anger-inducing situations.

These ideas may be effective and appropriate when a threat is immediate and immediate action is required because you need a quick distraction before some harm is done.

A More Pervasive Anger

There is a far-more-common form of anger that occurs over and over again without any real-time provocation. Such anger is an emotional response to the memory or recollection of an offense suffered in the past - sometimes many years in the past. When these memories pop into your mind as thoughts; and we mentally chew or ruminate on them; it can become just like the original incident all over again.

But, it’s all triggered by memories or thoughts. It’s not happening all over again in most cases.

Some will tell you to “work through your anger.” Analyze your angry and try to understand why you are angry and how you can deal with it. This doesn’t quite make sense. If your thoughts are making you angry, wouldn’t it likely make you more angry as you try to deal with each of the thoughts?

The solution to your anger is so simple that many people have trouble accepting it. The most effective way to control the negative thinking that results in recurring anger is "simply choose not to think about it." It can be very effective to name the thought, as in "“I will not think about _____________.”

When a negative thought that you know leads to anger pops into your mind, simply say to yourself out loud, “I will not think about that.” Do it again if the idea pops up again; “I will not think about that.”

Someone said, “That’s easier said than done.”

Not really. You have the built-in authority to decide what you want to think about. If a thought causes you anger, don’t think that thought. As you make that choice again and again, your subconscious remembers how you like to respond and will start to make your response automatically. It’s amazing how quickly this can happen.

Furthermore, you were made with a subconscious mind that has over time formed the opinion that you like being angry. So it tries to give you more opportunities, through selected thoughts, to be angry.

The process of choosing not to dwell on those thoughts will, over time, convince your subconscious that you do not want to think about that those things anymore. It’s this process that creates the habit of peace and breaks the habit of anger.

At some point, you won't even realize you are thinking the anger-provoking thoughts because your subconscious mind responds appropriately before they become conscious thoughts.

Nothing could be more effective than having your subconscious mind handle your anger for you before you even think about it. That is so cool!

Resources you can use

There’s a way to deal effectively with anger. Take 3 minutes to learn more at http://findingpersonalpeace.com/r000.

You can use this idea for just about any negative emotion or habit that bothers you including anger.

I hope Finding Personal Peace helps you as much as it helped me with my anger.

Rod Peeks