Relationships - What's in the Mirror?

Use a mirror to test the health of your relationships.

See Your Relationship?

Look in an imaginary mirror and picture what you would see if your relationship partner were looking at  you. Try to decide if you are pleased with the relationship as your partner sees it.

What kind of partner are you?

Do You Give Respect and Honor

• When you look at yourself do you see someone that shows respect and honor to your partner at every possible opportunity?


• Do you show respect and honor by your words and deeds?


• Does your partner get to walk daily in the reflection of your respect and honor for them?

Respect applies to opinions and ideas. Respect doesn’t let your partner be the butt of careless humor or embarrassment by you. You may have to practice some restraint when disrespectful words start to escape your mouth either about or in the presence of your partner.

Honor lifts your partner. Let the world see in your eyes that your partner has a worthy place in your mind and heart.

Your respect and honor should be so automatic that you do it reflexively. You shouldn’t have to think about it at all.

If you can’t do that, ask yourself why not. Try to recognize the thoughts that precede your lack of respect and honor and privately deal with them.

Do You See Truthfulness and Openness

When you look in the mirror, do you see truthfulness and openness? Do you hide things from your partner? Do you find it difficult to talk to your partner about some things?

You don’t want to burden and hurt your partner by raw but irrelevant details. But if something from your past has a bearing on the present relationship, it needs to come out.

Do You See Decorum and Decency

This may sound so twentieth century. Does your partner wish they were somewhere else when inappropriate language gushes from your mouth? Do your friends know details of your relationship that ought to be secrets between you and your partner? Do your children see or hear you embarrassing them or their other parent by your words.

There’s still a place for decency in this world. There are times and places that some topics or language should not be spoken. If you and your partner disagree on that, that’s a stress that your relationship doesn’t need. If it’s you, you can do something about it. If it’s your partner, they need to know that they are acting in a way that discomforts you. (see Truthfulness and Openness)

Do You See Safety and Security

Is your partner completely comfortable that you are not going to suggest a situation that endangers either of you? Is your partner certain that you will protect the security of your relationship vigorously?

While you may have a daredevil bent, it is not fair for you to expect your partner to share that nature or participate in such activities. It is not helpful to your relationship if you suggest actions that make your partner feel uncomfortable or worry about your safety.

Don’t give me the excuse; “If they loved me they would . . .” You might want to consider what is making you see those activities as fun when your partner sees them with fear.

What do you see in the mirror? Think about it.



www.findingpersonalpeace.com

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